Becoming Bones
by Pirrip
Summary: When a woman from the detective's past turns up, bringing with her a pile of animate human bones, the magical community gets turned upside down. Who is this girl? How does Skulduggery know her? And what- what has Skulduggery... done to her...?
1. Skulduggery?

Becoming Bones

Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Ghastly and Tanith slid into the grimy dark bar. Standing in a row, like a line of police officers they surveyed their surroundings. "You really do take us to the nicest places Skulduggery" muttered Tanith.

"It's Grand Mage, not him. He said that there have been sightings of shifty-looking living skeletons in this side of town." Valkyrie explained, wearily watching a small man hunched over what looked to be a rag doll.

"So… we're investigating sightings of… Skulduggery?"

"No. That's just it. Skulduggery hasn't been here in over 25 years. Right Skulduggery?"

Skulduggery Pleasant was silent, his empty eye sockets searching the dim room. The Grand Mage hadn't told them to investigate the sighting. He doubted if the Grand Mage would even have cared enough to say anything to him even if he did know. No- this information came from China Sorrows. She knew that he was searching for answers. She knew that, before he awoke a skeleton, forgotten on that battlefield, a different skeleton had been sighted. A skeleton that's left arm had been blackened from the elbow down. A skeleton that had danced surrounded by the bones of its once friends and enemies, chanting forgotten spells and throwing colour tinted fire into the dead sky like fireworks in darkness of midnight. Skulduggery Pleasant knew that this was the creature responsible for his current state, and every time a skeleton was seen that shouldn't be alive, Skulduggery investigated.

From what he could see, there was nothing too strange here: there were no dead people drinking at the bar. "Skulduggery?" asked Valkyrie.

"Hm? I mean, yes, no-" Valkyrie glared at the hat and scarf assembled before her, "I haven't been here for a very long time" he paused, cocking his skull to one side, "You make me feel old."

Ghastly shook his head at them, "What are we looking for?" he asked.

Skulduggery was silent again, watching the couple at the bar whose faces were covered with headscarves. _They are possibly the most normal people in the building _he thought.

"Skulduggery?"

Skulduggery watched as the couple got up, ignoring his companions.

"Skulduggery?"

The couple walked towards the four of them. Skulduggery realised that they were still stood in front of the door.

"Look at those two" murmured Ghastly, "You can't even see that one's face," he gestured towards the lean frame of the man on the right.

Skulduggery only had eyes for the girl. She was wearing a ripped Victorian-style dress, and had a shiny sapphire blue scarf wrapped around her head, as if shielding herself from the world around her. She hurried along, pausing only to turn and hurry her associate on.

As she slid past them, Skulduggery saw her eyes. Eyes such a cool blue that they sent shivers down his spine. Those impossible pale blue eyes, sad yet warm.

_Her_ eyes.

Skulduggery stepped closer but the girl had already gone. Deep in his heart he knew it wasn't her. He knew he was never going to see her again. And it was entirely his fault.

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><p><strong>Okay, so I hope you enjoyed that. I'll try and get some more up soon. As always, please review.<strong>

**-Jaq Neveah  
><strong>


	2. Fish & Chips

Chapter 2

Kern Portend did **not** like being dead. Nor did he like the future. And at this moment, he didn't like the girl beside him either. Being a sensitive type of fellow, he told her this.

The girl beside him pulled her sparkly blue scarf tighter around her slender body, trying to ignore the thick-skinned adolescent beside her. Since she'd seen Ghastly in Aideen's tavern she'd been shaken. Should she have said something? Would he have even have remembered her? Of course he would have: she was a hard person to forget.

Kern Portend did not like sitting on a cold wall by an empty main street. Nor did he like being ignored. And he was hungry. He expressed this.

The girl sighed, "Please be quiet."

Kern paused, looking at her. It was hard not to look really; her face was paler than the reflection of the moon in the puddle beside them. "Sooo" Drawing out the word, he glanced around, "What's the plan of action? I mean look at us. We're hungry, cold, dirty and hungry. And what are we going to do? Are we going to storm the Irish Council of Elders? I'm assuming that we're still in Ireland, although nothing looks the same. Even the tavern's changed" _And I thought that place couldn't get any worse._ "Nothing looks the same. Nothing" He paused for dramatic effect, "Nothing! Do you hear me? You're not even listening!"

The girl sighed again, "You said hungry twice."

"That's because I'm truly hungry! I feel like I haven't eaten for 100 years!"

The girl sighed for the umpteenth time, "Use your damn brain. Follow your nose, there's a bakery across the track."

Kern looked across the road at the brightly lit shop in front of him. "Oh" he murmured, launching himself off the wall.

As Kern ambled towards Tony's Fish and Chip Shop, the girl decided to come up with a plan of action. After four seconds, she had worked a sufficiently simple plan; find the Council of Elders, find Ghastly, and… get some new clothes. She hated to admit it but both herself and Kern looked like they had just stepped out of a grave. Her favourite dress had been ripped and torn in more places than she could count and her hair was almost as limp as she felt. She knew she shouldn't have messed with Kern's life force; her soul was well and truly messed up.

**Thump**. The girl jumped, turning to see Kern huffing beside her. Seeing the girl's dainty raised eyebrow, Kern snarled, "Well I **can't** eat can I? I'm **dead**."

The girl shook her head. This was going to take some explaining. "Get up Bones, we're going for a wander."

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><p><strong>Okay, so I just want to say thank-you to mochabelle33, NightCoree.x and Giana Sparrow for reviewing. You have no idea how much it means to me. I'll start writing the next chapter straight away just for you guys. <strong>** Jacqueline xx**


	3. Sliding Panels

Chapter 3

Having already searched the building from top to bottom, Valkyrie and Tanith were bored stiff. They were at Skulduggery's house, waiting for the detective to appear from one of the many rooms they had already explored. As Valkyrie had once pointed out to Skulduggery, his house had no secret passageways, no underground dungeon and no paintings with eyes that followed you. The house didn't even have turrets with little flags on the top. The house wasn't very magical at all; it was **dull**.

The girls had been in every panelled wall room in the house and had found a variety of boring objects; several armchairs, an alarming amount of cracked mirrors, a book named "How to build your own fireplace" by C.H. Davenport, and a rather amusing picture of a baby kitten which Skulduggery denied all knowledge of possessing.

With nothing left to do, Valkyrie and Tanith had decided to stand by the front door, talking loudly about leaving to go to Ghastly's shop. "What on earth do you think he's doing in there?" Tainith asked after several loud conversations about Valkyrie's new coat.

Valkyrie sighed, "Probably looking at his skull from every different angle in the mirror again."

Tanith turned towards the front door. Realising she wasn't listening to her, Valkyrie copied Tanith's movements. She heard the heavy footsteps clomp up the stone driveway. Valkyrie froze… And then was thrown sideways into the wooden panelling.

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><p>Ghastly Bespoke didn't like it when Skulduggery was in one of his moods. He doubted that Valkyrie and Tanith had realised there was something up with him yet- they hadn't known him for as long as he had.<p>

Ghastly parked his van on the drive of Skulduggery's home, still contemplating why the skeleton was acting so strange. He got out of the van, shutting the door softly behind him. _Skulduggery has been acting out of character since last night… So something to do with the errand the Grand Mage had sent them on…_

Ghastly strode towards the entrance of the old house, his feet guiding him along the familiar pathway, _had the Grand Mage angered the detective?_ Ghastly wanted to ask the skeleton what had happened, but knew that he would just shut him out like he always did when something was really bothering him. He **hated** it when he did that. _Well, I won't let him shut everyone out this time _Ghastly thought. He reached the house, just managing to stop himself from punching the wall- something he hadn't wanted to do since the dark days of the war.

Intending to storm up to the flamboyant egotist and demand that he pull himself together, Ghastly Bespoke threw open the front door. He didn't expect it to hit anything.

Nor did he expect Valkyrie to be waiting by the door. Valkyrie was flung through the air into the panelled wall, which opened to receive the teenager plunging towards it.

...The panel coarsely slid closed with a sickening crunch, sealing Valkyrie inside the endless darkness.

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><p><strong>I have been in the process of writing this chapter for... ooh... 13 days now (13 DAYS! 13. Whole. Days. I wanted to have this posted way before that- 13 days!). Even thought this chapter has been that long in the making, it still feels kind of... rushed? Hm...<strong>

**I'm missing my reviewers. Please come back, even if just to tell me that this chapter seems rather hasty. I miss you guys. **

**I'm going to just go ahead and say that if you review I'll update quicker. I know everyone says it, but it is just so true.**

**-Jaq Neveah ****xx**


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